Wanna win a free t-shirt? All you need to do is go see the minor league West Michigan Whitecaps play at Fifth Third Ballpark in Comstock Park, Michigan. And eat a 4-pound burger stacked with five beef patties, five slices of cheese, almost a cup of chili, a load of salsa, and some corn chips for good measure. (Alka Seltzer is extra.)

It comes served on an 8-inch bun, will set you back $20, and packs a Michael Phelps-sized 4,800 calories. More than twice what should eat in a normal day. (This is where I insert the obvious "health strikeout, but promotional home run" line.)

But a free t-shirt is a free t-shirt. And you'll have to eat the entire monster burger in one sitting to score it. No slicing it up like a pizza and sharing with buddies, like the majority of the people who order it do. No pic of the coveted shirt was available, but I'm gonna guess it's only available in a 2XL.