Bar Necessity

We’re guys. Guys are expected to know certain things. And there seems to be this presumption that one of those things is the recipe for any drink ever concocted. Whether we’ve ever had it, heard of it, or if it was just created in Prague the day before by a bartender named Bernat. We have to know how to make it.

Say you have a date over. You offer her a drink. She asks for something easy like a Bay Breeze. But you forget if it needs pineapple juice or grapefruit juice. Innocent enough. Bay Breeze. Sea Breeze. Very similar. One ingredient off. But you don’t want to ask her, because you might get that look. The look that says, “I don’t know what’s in it. I just LIKE it. Why don’t YOU know what’s in it? The last guy I dated knew what was in it.” So you just wing it, figuring chances are good she won’t be able to taste the difference. (And for future reference, Bay Breeze gets pineapple.)

Or maybe you’ve been at a party and asked if anyone needs a drink. There’s always some chowderhead who has to ask for something obscure, like a Creamy London Fog or a Waikiki Beachcomber, because he’s trying to impress everyone. (See my post How to Spot an Asshole, here.)

The thing is, you may know more than your share of drinks, but you can never hope to memorize all the drinks that are out there. And it’s always going to feel “un-manly” to ask what’s in it. So I have something I keep on my bar that has helped over and over: The BarMaster Deluxe.

It’s a pocket-sized electronic encyclopedia of drink recipes. All the classics. All the newest ones. And many you’ve never heard of. You can search by drink name, by ingredients, by type of alcohol, even by the type of glass it goes in. There’s also bar tips, toasts, and even jokes categorized by subject. (Some of which aren’t half bad, but tell at your own risk.)

Everything is right there for you to mix drinks, or suggest drinks to a date. You’ll just have to get Bernat to email you whenever he makes up something new.

$29.95 www.excaliburelectronics.com