Let me state right up front that I am not a fan of the Oscars. Watching a bunch of grossly overpaid celebs half-heartedly try to feign sincerity was funny for a while. Now it's like wearing wet wool - annoying and irritating, and you can't wait to get it off.

You know what I'm talking about. The rarely-funny jokes the host is forced to tell. The cringe-inducing attempts to be hip and edgy. The fake tears of the winner, the fake smiles of the losers. It's enough to drive you to drink.

Which is exactly what I'm going to do. I got sent a bunch of cocktail recipes that were created by Pernod Ricard USA's Spirits Desk to honor the Best Picture Nominees. I'm up for any new drink recipes, but movie themed drinks? Too far even for me.

Then I thought, hmmm, maybe these might make the award ceremony more enjoyable. So I decided to toss around some ideas for an Academy Award drinking game. Like doing a shot when a male celeb is shown wearing a "unique" tuxedo. Or drinking whenever a female winner puts her hand over her heart and pretends to be sooooo incredibly shocked, and utters something along the lines of "I never expected this. Honestly. Truly." (Take an extra drink if she then proceeds to pull out a prepared speech.)

Drink from the moment the presenter says "And the winner is..." and keep drinking until they say the winner's name.

Drink if the camera cuts to the loser and they are looking upset, then snap on a smile when they realize the camera is on. Or drink when any of the host's jokes fall flat, or better yet, evoke an audible groan. (Which should have you drunk enough to sit through three hours of this stuff.)

And, when Martin Scorsese FINALLY wins a much deserved Best Director Oscar, down your entire drink.

Make up some of your own, and post them here in the comments section. Three of the drink recipes are below, based on my three personal favorite nominated movies. And the winner is...

"The Departini"
(Created in honor of The Departed)
2 parts Tequila Tezon Reposado
1 part Martell Cognac
1 part Cointreau
1 tbsp agave nectar
Squeeze of lime juice
Shake well and serve up in a martini glass. Garnish with a lemon wedge.
*Recipe by: Tequila Tezon

"Sunshine in Malibu"
(Created in honor of Little Miss Sunshine)
1 part Malibu Mango Rum
1 part Malibu Pineapple Rum
Fill with orange juice
Combine ingredients in a highball glass over ice.
*Recipe by: Malibu Rum

"Lychee Letters"
(Created in honor of Letters From Iwo Jima)
.5 part SOHO Lychee Liqueur
2 parts Martell Cognac VSOP
1 part pomegranate juice
1 part orange juice
Spoonful of sugar
Serve over ice in a rocks glass.
*Recipe by: SOHO Lychee Liqueur

This is not your father’s energy drink. It’s not even technically an energy drink. Fever is the first ever “libido stimulant beverage” (yes, that means exactly what you think it means), and was recently launched in major city nightclubs and bars. (Launching a libido stimulation beverage in bars and nightclubs? First, that's marketing genius, and second, why the hell wasn’t I invited?)

Vanilla flavored, Fever contains a combination of eight organic herbs that enhance sexual performance and help reduce recovery time between “sessions”. And, no surprise, they’ve developed some cocktails that use Fever and served them at the bar and nightclub launch. Hmm. Cocktails that get you drunk AND horny. Is that even legal? Just in case they get outlawed I'm posting a couple of the recipes below. Then I’m requesting a list of those nightclubs and bars.
www.feverusa.com

For you: Bull Fever
1 oz Vodka
1 oz FEVER
1 oz Fruit punch
1 oz Red Bull
Put a few cubes of ice in a shaker and add the vodka, fruit punch and FEVER. Shake well. Strain into a tall glass filled to the top with ice. Top off with Red Bull. Lock yourself in a cage.

For her: Pink Fever
1 nip of Triple Sec
1 nip Crème de Banana
2 oz FEVER
Cream
Berry Punch
Soda Water
1/2 pint of berries
Prepare a tall glass with sugar rim and half a handful of berries on the bottom. In a shaker add nip of crème de banana, 1 nip of triple sec, 45mL non sweetened cream. Shake and add berry punch, FEVER and soda water. Stir and pour into glass. Try to remain calm.

A short intro today. I am heading out to prepare a special dinner. For two. Here's a few drinks you can mix for your own Valentine. Because sometimes you need a little liquid lubrication...

St. Valentine's Day Massacre
1 1/2 oz. vodka
1 oz. Campari bitters
1/2 oz. lime juice
1 tsp superfine sugar
1 oz. cranberry juice




Fill a shaker 2/3 with ice. Add all ingredients. Shake. Strain into a martini glass. Add a lemon twist.
[From the book The Daily Cocktail - 365 Intoxicating Drinks and the Outrageous Events that Inspired Them, by Dalyn Miller and Larry Donovan]

The Sweetheart
1.5 oz. Cuervo Citrico*
Splash of sour mix

Add Citrico and sour mix to shaker. Shake and strain into a shot glass. Add lemon wedge and sugar on rim.
[*Cuervo Citrico is their new flavored tequila with hints of citrus.]

Valentine’s Kiss
1 1/2 oz. Jose Cuervo Especial
2 oz. Chilled Cranberry Juice
2 oz. Chilled Apple Juice
Club soda or seltzer

Fill a glass with ice. Add tequila, cranberry juice, and apple juice. Top off with soda.


Plymouth Pom-Star
1 1/2 oz. Plymouth Gin
1 1/2 oz. Pomegranate Juice
1.5 oz. Passion Fruit Juice
Squeeze of lime

Fill a tall glass with ice, add Plymouth Gin and top with equal parts pomegranate and passion fruit juices.  Add squeeze of lime and then stir.

Godiva Peppermint Kiss
1 oz. Godiva Chocolate Liqueur
1 oz. Rumple Minze
1 sprig mint

Add Godiva Chocolate Liqueur and Rumple Minze to ice-filled rocks glass
and stir. Garnish with mint sprig

[Courtesy of www.thebar.com]

Gin & Sin
50 ml Plymouth Gin
50 ml fresh lemon-lime juice
Splash of Chambord

Add the three ingredients to a martini shaker with ice. Shake until chilled. Strain into a martini glass and garnish with lime wedge.
[Developed by bartender Jason Ash from AVA Lounge on top of the Dream Hotel in NYC.]


Cherry Truffle Martini
3 oz. cherry vodka
2 oz. of crème
1 oz. of grenadine
Touch of heavy cream
Truffle garnish

Add the first four ingredients to martini shaker with ice. Shake until chilled. Strain and serve up in a martini glass, garnish with truffle in bottom of glass.
[From Anthony Casagrande, director of cocktail development for the Night Hotel in NYC.]

Red wine drinkers? They drink from a deep, rounded glass designed to let the wine breathe. White wine has a specific type of glass too. And there are two designed for champagne. Beer drinkers? Doesn't matter. Bottle, can, glass, mug, straight out of the keg... whatever works.

Now beer drinkers can feel as sophisticated as their grape swilling brothers. Boston Beer Co. has unveiled the Samuel Adams Boston Lager Pint Glass.

Jim Koch, the hyper-obsessed beer god who created Sam Adams, wanted a glass that showcases beer as brewers intended and "elevates the craft-beer drinking experience (and) offers beer lovers a full sensory experience..." (The man loves his beer.)

The glass has a neck and lip design that helps sustain the beer's head (insert head joke here) and helps release the hop aromas. For those of you who prefer to sip, not chug.

Available in March, they'll be sold in packages of four for $30

www.samueladams.com

Thanks to Kyle for the tip