Remember the old tip-and-strip pens from back in the day? The ones where a bikini-clad hottie, (hot by 70's standards anyway) would end up naked when the pen was tipped into writing position? And guys in brown-checked leisure suits with shaggy pre-mullets and porn mustaches would laugh their asses off? I have an updated version for you.

Blue Ball Sports (perfect) has developed the Putt-Her. Based on the same principle as the tip-and-strip, this regulation sized putter appears to be just like any other standard golf club when sitting upright in your bag. But take it out and drop it into putting position, and a lingerie-wearing beauty will slowly reveal herself. (Insert innuendo about dropping your ball in the hole here.)

They've also got a version that, for you fans of the classics, features a model in a bikini. And for you purists, who argue that women on adult novelty items should only ever appear topless... there's a Jenna Jameson model. Yup. You can now wrap your hands around your favorite porn princess right on the green. (Insert innuendo about Jenna sinking your balls here.)

It's my pick as the best holiday gag-gift for the dads, uncles, bosses, golf buddies, brothers-in-law, etc. on your list. Especially if they still have the 70's porn 'stache.

Bikini and Lingerie versions $59.95 each www.blueballsports.com
Jenna Jameson version $69.95 www.jjputter.com

The Humpday Giveaway. A mid-week distraction to help get you through till Friday. It's also a way I can let a few guys try some of the products I review here.

This week, 10 readers will win a can of Jig-A-Loo lubricant. Different than the other spray lubricants we've all used for years, Jig-A-Loo is silicone based. It contains no oil, grease, or wax, (which is more than I can say for some of you), so it doesn't drip. Or stain. Which means you can use it, not only on metal, but on wood, plastic, leather and fabric.

Why would you need to unstick fabric? You wouldn't. (Unless you are really, really lazy when it comes to doing laundry). But because Jig-A-Loo is silicone based, it also prevents rust and works as an all-weather protector, helping to repel water off of shoes, boots, jackets, and all your outdoor gear. It can also be sprayed into locks to prevent them from freezing.

Jig-A-Loo has been used for industrial purposes since 1958, and it's been huge among consumers in Canada since the 90's. (Where keeping things from freezing and repelling weather are national pastimes.) It just recently became available in the US.

If you'd like to be one of the 10 who get to give Jig-A-Loo a try, send an email to me at giveaway@thebachelorguy.com. In 50 words or less, tell me what's got you stuck, and why you need it loosened. The most creative emails win.

Stuff you need to know: The winning Jig-A-Loo cans will only be shipped to the 48 continental United States, so you'll need to live there, or have a mailbox there, in order to collect the prize. All emails become property of TheBachelorGuy.com, and the winning entries may be posted on the site and/or in upcoming emails. You must be 18 years or older to win. No purchase necessary. Void where prohibited. Actual mileage may vary.

About $6.50 for a 10.9 oz can. www.jigaloo.com

Nike, the mega shoe/apparel/eyewear/golf/sports equipment company you want to hate, but just can't, has combined two things guys love: Golf and blowing stuff up.

To promote their new, just-barely legal, extra-long driving golf ball, dubbed Juice 312, (apparently after Barry Bonds, a huge golf fan), they have videos of pseudo lab tests posted on their website. In the videos, two lab-coated, goggle wearing "scientists" shoot the balls into things like lava lamps, jello molds, and jars of mayo. You view the explosive results in super slo-mo. And if you play golf like I do, you're used to watching your shots smash things into pieces.

Watch the videos here.

Been to a Starbucks lately? Macchiato. Chai latte with soy. Double decaffeinated half-capp, skinny no whip. You need to spend a year apprenticing under a master barista in Italy just to be able to order intelligently, let alone actually brew some for yourself. (Personally, I think what they've done is genius: Get people hooked on something they can't ever hope of making at home, so they have to come to you to buy it.)

The last time you went out on a date: Did she order coffee after dinner? Or ask to go to a coffee shop after the movies? Chances are she did. Was it even considered that, instead, you both go back to your place for coffee? Probably not, since you and your pal, Mr. Coffee, can only do so much. As far as you know, whipping up an after-dinner cappuccino requires special equipment, a crew of five or six highly trained experts, safety goggles, insulated gloves, and ingredients you have to buy on the black market.

If you’d rather be able to say, “How about we head back to my place for a latte?” then you should check out the Tassimo Hot Beverage System from Braun. We have one in the Bachelor Pad test kitchen, and everyone here is addicted to it now. Part of the reason is how easy it is to use, (you just pop in a “T Disc” of whatever you want, and hit the button), and part is its versatility. It can brew single cups of coffee, tea, hot chocolate, and real espresso, latte and cappuccino… basically anything they have a T Disc for. Each in about a minute. With no measuring, changing of filters, or cleanup needed.

Tassimo even has recipes on its website that give suggestions on how to make unique drink creations, like Candy Bar Hot Chocolate and Glorious Affogato, (basically ice cream drowned in espresso). So now you can invite her back for something she can’t get at any coffee shop.

$129.99 www.tassimo.com

You've finally decided to make the jump to digital TV, but have no clue about what to look for, whether to choose LCD, DLP, or plasma, or what size is best for your room. (And, yeah, size matters here.) Buying electronics is confusing enough, but with technology changing every week, you can make yourself nuts trying to make a decision. And with a few grand on the line, you want to make sure you make a sound decision.

When I bought recently, I found it tough to get straight answers. The sales people at the big name stores? Useless. You'd get more accurate answers asking a five year old to explain quantum physics. I asked some friends, and fortunately one had serious knowledge. And I spent hours researching online. As a matter of fact, a recent survey by the Consumer Electronics Association and Yahoo found the average consumer spends 15 hours researching and comparing products online before making a purchase. And to me that sounds low. As the holidays get close, you aren't going to have that kind of time to surf around looking for answers.

I heard that Panasonic is opening up its Plasma Concierge Service to the general public for the holidays. Normally it's only open to HD plasma owners, but they are making it available to anyone who wants expert answers, from a real live human, until December 31.

You can access the service by calling 1-888-777-7134, Monday-Friday, 9am-9pm ET.

Look in your fridge. Right now. Wedged between the half-empty jar of jalapeno gherkins and the 24-pack of longnecks, there is a plate of something with plastic wrap over it. $5 says that you can't remember what the hell it is. $50 says you have no idea when the hell it got there. And double or nothing you toss it out rather then risk an intestinal mutiny for eating it. (Note to readers: This wager is purely for illustration purposes. Do not email me telling me it's a piece of blackened grouper you put in there last Thursday and where-the-hell-is-my-fifty-five-dollars.)

Sure, you could be proactive and write the date it entered your fridge on the plastic wrap with a black Sharpie. But who does that? I only knew one person who was anal enough to do it regularly, and I'm pretty sure it was one of the reasons I broke up with her.

Solution: Timestrip Smart Labels. Peel the backing off this single-use strip, squeeze the bubble on the back, and stick it on your leftovers. (The packaging, not the actual food.) A red line in the time window will let you know how long the food's been in your possession. When the window is full of red, time to toss it.

The strips come in a variety of timelines, from 7 days up to 12 months. And they're perfect for other items like medications, eye drops, wine, whatever. Just slap one on and you'll never have to guess when it's time for it to go. Now if we can just get them to do the same for boy-bands.

www.timestrip.com

There comes a time in every man's life when it's time to take the posters you've had since college off the wall and make the leap to grown-up artwork. (And face it: women over 25 are rarely impressed by your collection of Manga posters.) For some, the transition is tough. Giving up the college decor means facing adulthood. Other guys just can't find anything they'd like to hang in its place. They want something that says "guy", but is still arty enough to say "grown-up guy".

With a collection of over 10,000 campus and athletic images, ReplayPhotos.com can let you decorate your place with art that lets you straddle both worlds. Their photos include some of the most memorable moments in college sports, historical black and white images, and magazine quality shots of campus landmarks from 29 Division I universities.

Didn't go to college? Click the Top Sellers button to see the most popular images sold. Hang a few, mix some drinks, and tell her stories about the good times you spent at the Oval.

www.replayphotos.com

Raise your hand if you have a decorative tissue box cover in your bathroom. Yeah, thought so. Most guys I know don't. You buy tissues. The box is decent. The color sorta matches the walls. And you put it on your counter. Boom. Done.

Almost every woman I know has a decorative tissue box cover. One that matches her soap dish, lotion dispenser, toothbrush holder, toothbrush, towels, toilet paper, decorative wallpaper border... And they are horrified when they go to a guy's place and see a naked tissue box on the counter. Or, worse, when they see a cover that's "tacky". (You guys who have the commemorative NASCAR set know what I'm talking about.)

To help those who may be decoratively challenged, Kleenex is rolling out their new Expressions line. The oval-shaped boxes come in nine vibrant patterns that will please even the most discriminating female guests. Great for your office too.

Kleenex
At stores nationwide.

You live for golf. But you're also a big fan of hoops. You want something that shows your love for both in one functional, yet stylish, product. I haven't seen any basketballs that look like oversized golf balls. Or any backboards made to look like a putting green. Why? I don't know. Maybe I'm just ahead of my time. But I have seen this: a basketball/golf bag mashup that'll impress a fan of either sport.

The Original Bag Co. teamed up with the NBA to create the NBA Pebble Grain Golf Bag, definitely the most unique golf bag I've seen in a long time. Covered in the same material used for regulation NBA balls, (or, I'm guessing former NBA balls, since they implemented new ones with a synthetic cover this year), the bag is not just all form and no function. It has a 6-way, padded, full-length divider that holds 14 clubs, and has ten pockets for everything from your cell phone to your sunglasses to your balls and gloves. They even included an insulated beverage holder.

And for those of you who can't get enough NBA-ness, you can buy the matching NBA Pebble Grain Golf Head Covers. They are available for your driver, or in a 3-pack for your woods, tastefully topped off with a numbered jersey hangtag.

$149-$199 NBA Pebble Grain Golf Bag
$16.95 Driver cover
$60 3-Pack of wood covers
www.nbastore.com and sporting goods retailers nationwide

The same engineering whizzes at Panasonic that brought us the jaw-dropping, envy-inducing, and yes, massively-overcompensating, 103" plasma TV earlier this year, have done it again. They have unleashed their new 1080p HD LCD Home Theater Projector at the Pre-CES New York Press Preview.

Designed for home theater enthusiasts, (and guys who want to show off), the PT-AE1000U is capable of reproducing movies and TV shows with incredible color accuracy and can project a 100" diagonal image from about five feet from the screen. Yes. 100 inches. Of HD quality picture.

And at an MSRP of $5999, it's a helluva lot more affordable than the $70,000 you'd pay for the 103" plasma. Start planning now - the Super Bowl is only a few months away.

www.panasonic.com/projectors for more details.

As the holidays close in, and airfares go up, a lot of guys are planning on road tripping to see family and friends, rather than fly. As a veteran of several of these trips, I can tell you there are many advantages. You can pack pretty much everything. You don't have to ship any gifts home due to luggage restrictions. And it's perfectly ok to have a dog as your co-pilot.

The only limitations are how long you are willing to sit in traffic, and how much cargo your car will hold. Can't help you with the first one. But I can with the second.

Yakima, makers of great ski and bike racks, have come out with their GetOut Pro. A soft-sided gear pack that attaches to the the side rails or crossbars of your car or SUV, the details are all here. The bottom has a quilted pad so it doesn't scratch your car. The outside is waterproof and made of "Anti Bug" material, making it easy to clean. Inside there is a reflective liner for maximum visibility. The zippers are protected with deep, velcro-secured flaps, and the lid is padded to minimize wind-flap. Speaking of wind-flap: there are also soft strap management tabs to protect your car from buckles whipping against the paint at 70 mph.

With the extra 13 cubic feet of cargo space you get, you can use it to haul all your hunting gear, camping equipment, or that fruitcake grandma made you.

$159 www.yakima.com

It's a typical Monday. You're dragging from lack of sleep. Head still ringing from cheering and beering in the stadium. And, as you try to unclog your sinuses from the cold that's coming on, you begin to realize that a game of shirts vs. skins in 40 degree weather was probably not a good idea.

Before you pop a bottle of Vitamin C, drink gallons of hot tea, or down enough chicken soup to fill a kiddie pool, grab a packet of Emergen-C. I've been using it daily for years. One packet mixed in 6 oz. of water has 1000 mg of Vitamin C, 32 minerals and a bunch of B vitamins to help snap you out of the Cocktail Flu.

It comes in a ton of flavors, and is available in formulas made with lycopene for heart health, calcium for bone health, and glucosamine for joint health.

Forget about all the technical stuff about why Vitamin C and minerals work, how the fizzing speeds absorption, or how the Vitamin B complex jump starts your energy. Since women tend to not go for the watery-eye-sniffling-coughing-clammy-skin look, you need it to work. Just know that it does.

$14.95 for a box of 36 packets. www.alacer.com

First let me apologize for posting a closeup pic of some guy’s junk. But in the interest of fully appreciating this product, it was warranted.

The guys’ answer to the WonderBra, the Wonderjock, by Sydney, Australia based aussieBum, is designed to “keep everything positioned forward and proudly on display to the world in a larger than normal manner”.

According to aussieBum, the Wonderjock – selling under the sounds-like-a-missle name “Patriot” – was developed in response to “the most requested wish men have made of the company since its inception”. This is backed up by worldwide sales of over 50,000 pairs in 7 days. That's a lot of jacked-up jocks.

Solely in the interest of providing information for you, my beloved readers, I have ordered a pair to try. Again, this is purely scientific. I swear.

Stay tuned.

I think every guy's kitchen needs a fryer. Easy, doctor. I'm not advocating eating yourself into an early coronary. I'm just saying. We're guys. We eat fried foods now and then. Because they taste good. Really good. Chicken, fish, mozzarella cheese, hell even Twinkies taste better fried.

And better to make it at home, where you know what's really in the oil bin. But i've tried several home fryers and none get hot enough to get food really crispy. And nothing sucks more than soggy wings.

T-fal just came out with the Emerilware Fryer this month. So I took a look at it. Mostly because Emeril's name is on it. All his BAMing and kicking stuff up a notch kills me. He's a guy's chef - making big, spicy, guy food.

His fryer looks like someone took an industrial one and shrunk it down to fit your countertop. Brings me back to my "Do you want fries with that?" days.

This thing has a man-sized capacity: it'll hold 3.3 liters of oil and can take over 2.5 lbs. of food. It also has an automatic filtration system that tells you when it's time to change the oil. There's a digital timer too, so your food doesn't get reduced to charcoal. Best of all, it has a professional-grade heating element so you can get your onion rings seriously crispy. And everything but the heating element is dishwasher safe.

And to get you kicking it up a notch at home I'm including Emeril's own recipe for Louisiana Hot Wings. BAM!

$149.99 www.emerilappliances.com

You're on a road trip. You pull over at the Largest Turnip in the Continental US. Your buddy jumps out, runs over, and does something no human being should ever do to a turnip.

You grab your camera, (gotta have good blackmail material for later), and the memory card is full. You don't have your computer with you, so you can't offload any pics. You have a choice: miss this pic opportunity, or quickly scroll through and decide what pic to delete. By the time you do, your buddy is being hauled away by Turnip Security and the moment is lost forever.

No one should ever miss the opportunity to photograph their best friend defiling a large turnip. Or any oversized vegetable for that matter. So, in the interest of ensuring moments like these are not lost forever, I gave The Picture Porter from Digital Foci a try.

It's a compact (5"x2.75"x1"), lightweight (8.6 oz.) and easy-to-carry card reader with a 2 inch full-color screen and a 40GB hard drive. Yup. 40 Gig. That's a ton of photos. Plus it stores and plays videos and music as well.

The Picture Porter worked like a dream right out of the box. Easy to set up, it reads and writes to all the popular card formats. It also functions as an external hard drive for your PC files via its USB. And it comes with video cables so you can view your pics on your TV.

Also great for business use, like trade shows and presentations. Or for viewing evidence at your buddy's arraignment.

From $299 www.digitalfoci.com