There was some great feedback on the MILFs and Cougars: A Practical Guide piece I posted yesterday. A lot of you mentioned "Pumas", a younger breed of cougar that dates even younger guys. I will definitely use that in the future. However, I could have done without hearing about Albino Panthers from the guy who works in a nursing home. (Don't ask.)

There were excellent comments on the post as well. My personal favorite was posted on Digg.com by mleaman: "Women are like bananas, they're sweeter once they get a few brown spots." Well said. And apparently amazed-to-still-be-alive, cranky old grouch, Andy Rooney of 60 Minutes, agrees.

The following was sent to me by an old friend of mine (who happens to fall firmly in the MILF category). It's attributed to Andy, and although I can't confirm it, it sure does sound like him. Here's his take on ladies in the Cougar Zone...

As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.

Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it. ...More

Let the ladies spend hours pouring over cute backgrounds and clever headlines when designing an email invitation for a party. When we're having the guys over for poker night or to watch the game, or putting a crew together to hit the clubs, all we want is the information. Straightforward and without all the hype and fluff.

If you've got an event coming up and you need to get the word out, forget the frilly emailed invites and use a Manvite. Stripped down to the bare necessities, your Manvite gives your invitees only the important facts: who, what, when, where, and why.

You set it up on one page with a few filled-in form fields and a mouse click. There's a button on the form that lets you select whether or not hotties are allowed to attend, and a Manvite Hall of Fame you look through for ideas on what to say. A large "Respond Here" button makes it easy for even the most toasted of your buddies to let you know if he'll be there.

A drop down menu at the beginning gives you a list of the most popular types of events other guys have thrown. Or you can select to create a custom event. Notice there are no listings containing the word "tea", or for showers of any kind. Let's keep it that way.

www.manvite.com

They're older. They're more experienced. And, according to the current trend, they're dating younger. They're MILFs and Cougars. If you've had the pleasure of being in the company of one or the other (or both, you lucky bastard), you know what the buzz is about.

For you younger guys who don't, you're going to need to be able to spot them, understand their behaviors and safely navigate their stalking grounds. While there may be some similarities between the two, there are also some important differences. So in the interest of furthering your knowledge (and pursuit) of each species, here is your Practical Guide to MILFs and Cougars. Happy hunting.

SCIENTIFIC CLASSIFICATION -
MILF: Mommialis Coitusdesirus
Cougar: Wrinklithicae Hornithalia


DEFINITION -
MILF: An acronym for Mom I'd Like to F*ck, the term gained widespread popularity after it was used in the film, American Pie. Some MILFs may still be married, but the recently divorced are the only ones you can safely pursue. (Unless you want her husband hunting you.) Some may eventually develop into full-blown Cougars.

Cougar: A woman generally over 40, who has "been around the mountain" a time or two. She may be long divorced, or in the case of particularly predatory Cougars, may never have been married.
...More

There's plenty of places to find tips on what to cook for the holiday, how to decorate, what drinks to serve, etc. But there's not a lot out there about the practical stuff you really need to know to survive the holidays.

Over at CHOW.com, they've got us covered. In their Holiday Central section of the site, there's a How-To section stocked with "All the tips and tricks you’ll need to achieve holiday greatness." Perfect. Holiday greatness is exactly what I had in mind.

If you're stuck with a bunch of boring relatives you've got nothing in common with, it can make an already long dinner feel longer than sitting thru a Celine Dion concert. Chow's "How to Talk to Boring Relatives at Dinner" can get you through their mind-numbing stories, without the urge to jamb turkey bones in your ears. ...More

Today was the last day for submitting entries to win the Bachelor Guy/TravelWorm.com Ultimate Vegas Bachelor Weekend, and I spent the better part of the day reading over the dozens and dozens of entries you guys sent in.

I have to say, you are one Vegas-vacation-needing group of guys. I've never read so many stories of extreme need for drunkenness, desire for female flesh, and craving for debauchery in my life. (With a lot of BG ass-kissing thrown in for good measure.) I honestly want to send everyone. Actually I'd rather take everyone. Some of you sound exactly like the kind of guys I want to spend 48 drunken hours in Sin City with. Next year. BG Bachelor Party in Vegas. Everyone's invited.

Until then, we can only choose one of you to win this trip. While all of you are deserving, and it was tough to narrow it down, below are the five entries (edited for grammar and spelling... don't you guys have spell check?), I've picked as finalists. (And a few honorable mentions that made me laugh.) The guys over at TravelWorm.com and I will pick the final winner, and I will announce it here on Wednesday. That way one of you will have something else to be thankful for on Thanksgiving.

For those of you that didn't win this time, there will be plenty more contests coming up next year. Keep your eyes open.

Here are the finalists:
...More

Brick and mortar stores have Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving that signals the "official" start to the holiday shopping frenzy. Online stores have Cyber Monday, a term coined by e-marketers back in 2005 to signal the official start of online holiday shopping. (Why Monday? Apparently because it's the first day back in the office after the long weekend, and more people have access to a computer and a faster 'net connection. Plus actually working is boring.)

Whether or not you believe Cyber Monday to be the legitimate busiest online shopping day - some researchers put the actual peak of online shopping somewhere in the second week of December, and a lot of the media believes it's just marketing hype to jump start sales (me included) - some retailers are rolling out sales and specials next Monday you may want to take advantage of. So guys, here's why you should log on, pour yourself a drink, and get all your holiday shopping done in the comfort of your home.

Advantage 1 - Keep Your Sanity
No traffic. No crowded parking lots. No mobs of screaming kids. No gift-crazed hordes jamming the stores. No overly zealous salesmen. And you can shop in your boxers.

Advantage 2 - Free Shipping
Many online sellers will be offering free shipping or reduced overnight shipping for the holidays. It may not sound like much, but shipping usually tacks on 10-20%of the purchase price - or more for expedited shipping - which most of us just look at as a premium for not having to fight the traffic and crowds at the malls. ...More

Heading over to Aunt Edna's house to spend Thanksgiving with a dozen or so relatives you avoid the rest of the year is stressful enough. Having those same relatives over to your place for Turkey Day dinner adds a level of pressure that could make you want to shave your head, climb a tower and start hurling sweet potatoes at strangers.

In case you got roped into hosting the dinner this year - or even if you foolishly volunteered for the job - you're gonna need a plan to pull it off without a major catastrophe. Or your guests resorting to a call to Domino's.

For some advice on how to host a mob of hungry family and friends without a hitch, I called Jennifer Farrell, lifestyle expert and host of A&E's home improvement show, Find & Design. I figure if she can take flea market junk and turn it into designer-style decor, she can help us get through the big night easy, cheap, and relatively unscathed. Here are her suggestions:

Tip 1 - Don't Cook.
"Why even try to cook?" Jennifer says. Many experienced cooks couldn't handle all the cooking for a dinner party for a dozen people by themselves, let alone someone with marginal kitchen skills. So don't even bother. Jennifer suggests having it catered. Many restaurants, delis and even supermarkets offer complete Thanksgiving dinners at a reasonable price. "You call a couple days ahead, pick it up Thanksgiving morning, and put out this beautiful spread," she says. No mess, no stress, and no worry about burning the turkey or mangling the sweet potato casserole.

Tip 2 - Hire a Housekeeper for a Day
Call a local cleaning service and arrange to have someone come over the day before the party and clean. Really clean. "It costs about $60," Jennifer says, "and will save you thousands in therapy." ...More

On Monday TravelWorm.com and I will be selecting the winner of the Ultimate Las Vegas Bachelor Weekend. So get your entry in by clicking here.

You can get all the details of my Vegas trip the exact one they are giving away, by reading the post here. But if you just want the bullet points of what you win, you get:
- Round trip airfare from anywhere in the continental US for you and three friends.
- Two rooms for two nights at the newly remodeled Planet Hollywood Casino Hotel.
- Four tickets to see "Stomp Out Loud!" playing right in Planet Hollywood.
- VIP entry and treatment at Scores Las Vegas.
- A recovery hangover brunch for all four of you at the Spice Market Buffet in Planet Hollywood.

Not a bad deal for telling me - in 250 words or less - why you should be the lucky SOB we send.

ENTER NOW

Las Vegas is once again embracing the "sin" part of its City of Sin reputation. While there's still an endless number of family-friendly shopping malls and attractions going up, many casinos are getting back to their roots as a place where men can go to be men. Drink. Gamble. And be surrounded by beautiful women.

Here are five casinos that do guys right, selected by me and the boys over at TravelWorm.com.

1. The Palms
The Palms is well known for its wild nights and celebrity appeal. Hit it in the evening, and you'll be ogling more than just the latest celebutant fresh out of rehab. Sexy mermaids come out to play by the pool when the sun goes down, and Tuesdays are Skinny Dip nights.

Feeling a little flush after your winning streak at video poker? Take the elevator to the only Playboy Club in the world, where cotton-tailed Bunnies will be happy to allow you to let it ride. And we promise, what happens here, stays here. ...More

They're questions you hear a lot: Which fork do I use? Is that my bread plate or yours? Is my glass the one on the left or the right? During the holidays there's a strong possibility you'll either be invited to a dinner, or giving one yourself. And knowing which one is your salad fork, or what that little spoon above your plate is for, can save you from embarrassing yourself.

To find out exactly how a proper table should be set, and what all those forks are for, I spoke to Diane Gottsman, a nationally recognized etiquette expert, author, and owner of The Protocol School of Texas, specializing in etiquette training for both corporate and social situations.

"There's nothing worse than sitting across the dining table from an important client - or worse, a date - and using his soup spoon or drinking from her water glass," Diane says. "A dinner meal can easily turn into a dining disaster. Don't be that guy!"

To help you not be that guy, Diane has created a diagram you can print out and use as a map to let you know what tools you're dealing with on a properly set holiday table. (Get a PDF of the diagram here.)

Some key things to remember:
- Utensils are used from the outside in. That means your salad fork will be the one furthest out from the plate. The fork you'll use for your main course will be the one closest to the plate. (The number of forks is also a good indicator of how many courses the host is planning to serve.)

- Since soup is typically served ...More

Not too much spirit from the guys out there. Just over a third of you (35.6%), really get into Halloween and spend some time on a creative costume. Which isn't bad, but it shows the majority of us don't get into it nearly as much as the ladies.

As for the rest of you: 1 in 6 (16.7%) don't bother at all, leaving the dressing up to the kids; 4.5 % (the smallest response group) will only dress if your girl makes you (more of you should dress with her... read my post about that here); and just over 43 percent of you (the most popular response) only dress if you're going to a party... but even then you just half ass it. Which shows the lengths you'll go for a cheese platter and free booze.

My new poll asks your thoughts on Vegas. I go a few times a year, for both business and pleasure, because there's no other party place on earth like it. (And I live near South Beach.)

I'm going this weekend with three buddies, courtesy of TravelWorm.com, to experience their Bachelor Weekend package. A package one of you will win. But more on that in upcoming posts. Now I just want to know if and why you go to Vegas.