[And all we have is breath mints and old condoms...]
LONDON, May 11 -- The introduction of sex toys into nightclubs across the UK is going down well [those Brits and their puns] according to the UK's largest nightclub operator, Luminar Leisure.
Luminar, owners of the Oceana and Liquid nightclubs, has agreed to a deal with leading pleasure
retailer Ann Summers to introduce a range of products into six late-night venues.
The range has been selected from Ann Summers best selling products and is available from branded vending machines that have been tactically positioned within venues to make them accessible to all clubbers. [I would assume near the alcohol, the bathrooms, and possibly the back alley.]
The trial - which is already proving popular with women and hen and stag parties - is due to be ramped up with the installation of machines into an additional six clubs this month.
Products available to clubbers include naughty sweets, forfeit cards, lube, garters and their best selling Rampant Rabbit.
"The products are being purchased mainly by women but are also proving popular with party groups... The July smoking ban will have an obvious impact on revenue generated from cigarettes but these new machines are not only adding to the fun club experience but sales have also been very encouraging." said Luminar. [Brilliant. Replace one oral fixation with another.]
Ann Summers Chief Executive Jacqueline Gold said: "Now that you can buy our world famous products in Luminar venues it guarantees clubbers the perfect end to a great night. From a woman's perspective, unlike anything else you might take home with you, this one is guaranteed to perform, will look as good the morning after, and won't lie about calling you!"