Ever hear the lame expression meant to show humility: "I put my pants on same as you, one leg at a time"? Apparently these guys did, and decided screw that, we're better than the rest of you. Even though they are obviously jobless and have nothing better to do than spend hours sitting around, thinking up new and creative ways to put their pants on two legs at a time, to show the rest of us. (We can only hope a couple of them suffered ball-threatening zipper injuries during rehearsal.)

The only redeeming value I can see for having this skill is for when you're jumping out some chick's window naked, after her husband comes home early. ...More

Being a "Pick-Up Artist" seems to be the hot thing these days. VH1 had a series where a "master" PUA taught a group of losers to become ladies men. (It was off the charts funny.) Writer Neil "Style" Strauss has a series of books on how to get Game. And the web is littered with sites from self-proclaimed gurus who swear their method is best for getting busy.

Over at TheGuyReport.com, they interviewed two PUAs to find out the secrets behind getting the women of your dreams. I'm not saying their techniques work. And I'm not saying they don't work. But I will say it makes for entertaining reading. Click here to read the interview.

Whether you're giving or receiving wine this holiday, storing those bottles - especially the rare ones, if you're lucky enough to get one - is more than putting it that decorative rack you got for your birthday.

Over at GearCrave.com, they've written a great post on how to keep your wine drinkable longer. There are tips on which wines should be stored chilled, and whether humidity is good or bad for your wine.

Most of us just tear through a bottle and don't need to worry about storage, but should your boss hand you a bottle of Mouton-Rothschild '67, you'll want to make sure you don't destroy it.

Click here to read the post.

You may get asked to carve the bird this Thanksgiving. And unless you know what you're doing - standing there, knife in hand, hungry family staring up at you - it can be a nerve-wracking experience.

There's no one right way to carve a turkey, as you'll see from the following videos, but there are some things to keep in mind, should the carving knife land in your hand.

1 - Make sure the knife is sharp. A dull knife will rip the tender meat apart, rather than slice cleanly through it.

2 - Let the turkey rest for about 20 minutes once it comes out of the oven. It'll cut better that way.

3 - Decide where the bird is going to be sliced. You can do it either on the table, in front of everyone, in which case you'll need to be fairly neat, or back in the kitchen, where a less refined technique, and some hands on assistance with separating bones, will work.

4 - Cutting and removing the legs (drumsticks), first makes the breasts more accessible. ...More

Ever said something you thought was completely innocent to an angry woman - trying to be a good guy and diffuse the situation - only to have your words add fuel to the fire? Yeah, me too. It's a regular occurrence, like the changing of the tides, or our president mispronouncing a word. But Sarah Miller, a relationship expert over at Men's Health, has a list of the worst things you can say to an angry woman. Along with some phrases you should be using. (Memorize them, men.)

The big five no-no's are:
1 - "Relax." (Apparently telling a woman who is freaking out to relax, is akin to telling her she has no reason to be upset. Never a good idea.)

2 - "I love you" when said during a fight. (This one is only to be used after the fight.)

3 - "It's up to you." A.K.A. "Whatever you want to do is fine with me."
(You're basically telling her you don't care.)

4 - "You knew I was this way when you married me." (Good idea, blame her for not realizing you're a jackass.)

5 - Saying nothing at all. (In this case, silence is not golden.)

In the article Miller gives suggestions for what you can say in place of each of these, as well as the "magic words", three phrases you can use as a get-out-of-jail-free-card when something you've done causes her to open up a six-pack of bitch on your sorry ass.

Read them here.

A guide, a gauge and a challenge to guys and DIYers everywhere, this list contains 25 skills the editors at Popular Mechanics feel every guy should know to survive the hazards and pitfalls of everyday life.

Covering everything from car repair (fixing a leaking radiator hose, changing the oil), to computer knowledge (protecting it from viruses, extending wireless network), to emergencies (rescuing a capsized boater, performing CPR), to fixing your pad (framing a wall, fixing a dead outlet, proper painting techniques), to outdoor survival (navigating with a map and compass, filleting a fish, building a campfire) the list is a great reference to have on hand, even if you already know a lot of the stuff it includes.

You can read the complete list here.

Sex outside of the bedroom can be the most memorable. (Sex outside of the house even more so, especially when you end up running half naked from the cops.) But something about sex in the kitchen has always been high on the Erotic Scale of Out-of-the-Bedroom Sexcapades. Even Hollywood has romanticized the act of kitchen coitus. Remember a pre-cosmetic-surgery Mickey Rourke seducing Kim Bassinger in the kitchen in 9 1/2 Weeks? And I never saw it (I swear), but I hear Like Water for Chocolate also has a memorable food-involved sex scene.

But is kitchen sex actually as romantic in "real life" as it is in the movies? Sure. But if you’re looking to have dinner with a bang (pun intended), understand that there are some hazards and pitfalls to watch out for. In the interest of making your kitchen counter encounter one she'll be telling her friends about, rather than the Emergency Room triage nurse, here are six "do's and don'ts" to keep in mind when the clothing, and dishes, start flying.

1- DON'T Attempt the "Aunt Jemima Treatment".
It may have worked for Bill Murray in the '80s movie classic Stripes, but propping your date up on the counter and prodding her with kitchen utensils most likely won't get you the same results that Bill got. Spatulas, whisks, slotted spoons, tongs... not exactly an erotic line-up. (More like stuff she sees at her doctor's office.) If you're looking for something extra to bring to the table, stick to the more traditional toys and equipment.
...More

40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN -

There are certain accomplishments and talents, no matter how proud you are of them or how difficult they were to achieve, that you may not want to use to impress women.
Andy: What am I supposed to say? I went to magic camp. I am an accomplished ventriloquist. I am a seventh-degree imperial yo-yo master. Oh do me yo-yo master, I want you to do me 'cause you're the yo-yo guy.


Often, how something sounds is much better than the actual experience.
Cal: We went to Tijuana, Mexico, you know? And we thought it would be fun, you know, to go to a show. Everybody says you gotta check out one of these shows. And... it's a woman fuckin' a horse. We get there and we think it's gonna be awesome and... it is not as cool as it sounds like it's gonna be. It's kinda gross.


The more hard work and effort you put into something, the more reward you will receive.
Cal: Listen, when I was growing pot, I realized that the more seeds I planted, the more pot I could ultimately smoke.


Simply pay attention to her. Listen to her. Talk to her. And you can be ugly as fuck. Or ugly as shit. (As long as you're not an arrogant prick.)
Cal: ...it doesn't matter if you're ugly as fuck, or you're ugly as shit. It's about talking to women. And I know how to do that because I observe. Because I am a novelist.
Andy: What? You never told me that before.
Cal: That's because I'm not an arrogant prick, Andy.


It's very easy to tell someone's sexual preference.
David: You know how I know you're gay?
Cal: How? How do you know I'm gay?
David: Because you macraméd yourself a pair of jean shorts.


Everyone needs a little wrong in their life.
Andy: This doesn't feel right.
Jay: Of course it don't feel right! What has felt right for you doesn't work! You need to try some wrong, dawg.


To be a successful bullshitter you've got to sell it.
Jay: Nastiest shit you've ever done? I'm talkin' about nasty!
Andy: Ahhhhhhhh... wow. Soooo many stories are running through my head right now. [pause] I dated this girl for a while... she was really a... nasty freak. She just loved to... get down with... sex all the time. It was like... anytime of day... she was like, "Yeah, let's go! I'm so nasty!" And I'd be nailing her and she'd be like, "Oh, you're nailing me! cool!" ...More

I'm a big weekend napper. About 20 minutes of afternoon recharging on the couch, and I'm good to go all night.

During the week I also have the urge to shut down for a few, but I've always been embarrassed about actually doing it. At one of my early jobs, the head of sales used to close his door and sleep for a half hour, and he was constantly ridiculed for being "lazy". Turns out he was probably more informed than the rest of us. And more alert.

Recent studies are showing that a short 20 minute "power nap" in the middle of the day can do more for you than a jolt of caffeine. And they keep you going until it's time to wind down for good and hit the sheets. Meaning you won't crash on the couch after the evening news, or more importantly, during happy hour.

If you are thinking of converting from Non Napper to Power Napper read this informative post on the 10 Benefits of Power Napping, and How to Do It from ririanproject.com. Besides giving you info on why, when and how to nap, it also lists the different types and lengths of naps so you can see which one is best for you, like the two-five minute Micro-nap or the 50-90 minute Lazy Man's Nap. As for me, I'm going to close my door for a 20 minute Original Power Nap.

www.ririanproject.com

Planning a bachelor party in Las Vegas can send even the most confident best man into a cold sweat. This is the day the group will talk about for years to come, and the soon-to-be-ex-bachelor will remember for the rest of his life. This is a big job for the best man and defacto party planner, and the pressure is on.

As Vegas’ premier five-star host and concierge service, I've created some of the most memorable bachelor party experiences this town has ever seen. Here are eight key things to consider before planning the groom's last hurrah of singledom.

1 - Determine What and How Many
While this seems obvious, and as much as you may want to surprise (or shock) the groom at every turn, it's always advisable to check with him to find out what he does - and doesn't - want to do. The groom also knows the others attending the bachelor party best, and can help ensure the trip is enjoyable for all. Work with him to determine how many guys are going to come out and who will partake in what activity.

2 - If You Fail to Plan – You Plan to Fail
Las Vegas is the number one spot on the planet to hold a bachelor party weekend and, with over a half-a-million visitors each weekend, it's not a town for spontaneity. If you don't plan your activities well beforehand, there's a chance you'll be shut out. ...More